Here’s a tip. Don’t call your loyalty program a loyalty program. 

​For one thing, competent marketers know better than to focus messaging on what they want to say or sell, but rather to focus on what their customers want to hear or buy. I can assure you that nowhere on the Things Customers Want to Hear or Buy List will you find, “To give you my loyalty.”

For another, I bet that your program gives customers points toward freebies in return for buying from you. The idea is that they’ll spend more dollars more often in order to build up points.1 I admit to pedantry here, but that’s not a loyalty program. It’s a frequency and rewards program.2

Increased frequency and spend are not the same thing as loyalty.

Come on. You’re not building loyalty. You’re bribing customers to return. No need to take exception at my invoking the B word. Bribing customers is a perfectly legitimate marketing tactic when we’re not talking about politicians. American Express Rewards, Marriott Rewards, Delta SkyMiles and others make an art of it. But if you think a bribed customer is a loyal customer, just wait until a competitor comes along and offers a richer bribe.
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Loyalty is attainable on the small scale, too. The owners of Los Garcia, my favorite, local Mexican restaurant, treat me so well that I feel pangs of guilt at the mere thought of going elsewhere for Mexican food.

​Apple-esque, Harley-esque, and Garcia-esque loyalty does not flow from any sort of program. It flows from delivering a consistent, uncommonly positive experience.

Want loyal customers? First try being loyal to them.

Dear Friend:

It’s that time of year when I plead with the four out of five who don’t experience holiday depression not to make things worse for the one out of five who does.

As an alleged human being, I have regard for my friends who love Christmastime. As a marketer, I have regard for the fact that, every year, it is the Christmas season that pulls many a retailer into the black.

But today I’m writing from the perspective of one who has struggled through not a few Christmas seasons himself. Other than to say that my holiday angst has nothing to do with religion, worry not, I shall spare you my tale. You’re welcome.
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1. Don’t call your friend a scrooge. It isn’t funny.

2. Don’t try to fix it.  There is nothing you can suggest that your friend hasn’t already heard, thought of, or tried.
 
3. Don’t rhapsodize about all of the happiness and joy that your friend should be feeling. That your friend isn’t feeling happiness and joy is kind of the point.
 
Optional: Don’t apologize if you happen to say “Merry Christmas.” Unless your friend is a jackass, there’s no need.

1. Listen. To be heard is balm for a chapped soul. Hearing is best achieved when the yap remains in the closed position.
 
2. Validate. Validation is the gentle art of showing that you get it. Try saying, and meaning it, “Thanks for sharing that. I understand better now.” If you like, you can even add the likes of, “That must suck for you.” (Remember that any attempt at offering advice would only show that you don’t get it after all.)
 
Optional: Ask, “Is there anything I can do?” Who knows. Maybe there is. If not, let it go.
 
The astute reader will have noticed that making things worse requires a good deal more work than not making things worse. By observing the above-listed recommendations, besides helping a friend survive holiday blues, you will lift quite the burden from your own shoulders. 

Kindest regards and best holiday wishes.